School, school and more school

I know, I know! I’ve neglected this space.  Grad School ain’t no joke!  Even though there are so many things in the past several months that I’ve wanted to write about…time just hasn’t been my friend.  My Mental Health Counseling program leaves very little “free time”.  I love ya’ll, but my pockets of freedom are given to my husband. I still want to be married come graduation, lol.

Thanks to all who continue to stop by…sorry there hasn’t been much to see.  I’ve been contemplating taking this blog in a new direction and with some free time over the summer, I possibly may do so.  I’ll keep you posted.  In the meantime, pray for your girl.  Four finals next week. YAY!


I’ve Got Good Hair (Part 2)

Seems that this subject keep coming up lately; Black women and their hair.  It’s to the point that major news papers (like TIME) are writing about it.  And as of recent, they’ve taken it all the way to the White House.

For the first time in U.S history, there is a family of color in the White House.  michelle-obama-vogueLet me clarify, a family of color that is the First Family of these United States and not a family of servants.  I’m just saying.  With Michelle Obama being the first black woman to ever be honored in this position, a lot of curiosity, commentary, and confusion has peppered the conversations of the American people.  Whether it is about her fashion choices, her patriotism, or, in this case, her hair, Ms. Lady is being talked about.  I believe she is not only an enigma to the white mass, but also to some of her black sisters.

This current article that discusses Mrs. Obama’s hair brings up some talking points.  Is her choice of wearing her hair straight making a statement – that straight hair is more professional? Desirable? Is her hair chemically relaxed, or straightened with heat? If it is the latter, would she ever where it natural?  But wait, if you pay close attention, her young ones seem to be chemical-free and only sport straightened styles for “special occasions”.   But why not have Sasha wear a cute afro puff at the Inauguration?  These are just questions, but I’m interested in knowing what you think/

Erroneous Noise – 2 Heads Are Better Than 1

two headphonesokay, okay, okay!  i am SUPA DUPA late posting this.  i’m here to let the world know that my wonderfully gifted and knowledgeable husband has a music podcast with our dear friend nelson (who is no stranger to this blog).  they’ve been hustling and flowing for a minute and i have failed miserably by not introducing you to their voices.  i know, i’m a bad wife, lol.  honestly, i was waiting for them to work out a few kinks and settle into their groove, and from where i’m listening, i think they have settled.  you’ve gotten a brief glimpse of my husband’s view on things when he ghost blogged here many moons ago.  now you actually get to hear him speak!

these two brothas are doing their thing, sharing their thoughts, expanding your knowledge on musical artists, all while having a good time.  and please don’t pigeon hole these two hip hop heads into a box!  you’ll be surprised what these cats listen to.  check them out, take a listen, leave  a comment and enjoy.

ladies and gentlemen, i present to you: Erroneous Noise

i’ve got good hair (part one)

i’m a woman who rocks her hair in the natural state that God blessed me with.  i had a perm for roughly 7 to 8 years (first relaxer at the age of 12) but was never the chick that wanted an extra long weave added to it thinking that it would make me more beautiful.  actually i was the one that just wanted my hair to grow longer, but would not sacrifice the health of my hair (back in the day it seemed like glue was all anyone knew to put a freakin’ weave in) to achieve a “look”.  also, i never had an issue with a black woman’s hair in it’s natural state. i often starred and admired the elite few girls that kept their hair unprocessed or wore locs in highschool.  i thought it was so cool.  so you can say, i was never addicted to relaxer.  it was just an option because i didn’t know jack be nimble about cornrowing and braiding.  but in between those touch ups,  i never freaked out when i saw new growth. and if my hair got caught in the rain, it was more of annoyance than the end of the world to me.

by my second year of college i was just over putting a relaxer in my hair to have the same busted, boring look that almost every other black girl had; a wrap.  i loved big hair, body and versatility.  i’ll just stop here and spare any more details about my transition back to “my roots” and say that at the age of 20 i cut off all the “dead ends” and have had my hair relaxer-free since then.

afrosthroughout this past decade i’ve heard comments from people that have really left me shaking my head.  in the beginning of my journey there were many questions of “so when are you going to perm your hair?” as if  my answer of “NEVER” actually meant “really soon” to them.  this was also coupled with the questions of “why would you do this?” “are you at least going to straighten it?”, and “i just liked your hair the other way.”  these statements were merely a reflection of the commenter’s insecurities/preferences and i realized had absolutely NOTHING to do with me.  i’ve come to understand that there are many people who feel uncomfortable seeing a black woman who is confident in who she is, nappy-kinky-coily-curly hair and all.

fast forward to the present, and well, it’s sad to say that some things have not really changed.  comments are a little different now.  i get more “ooh girl, you look so good, but only you can do that!” or “my hair would never look like that!” or “does it hurt when you comb it?”(seriously?)  and my personal favorite, ” i don’t have the face for natural hair.” excuse me?  how does that even make sense?!? lol. my feelings have shifted from annoyance to pity for these beautiful black women who still struggle with the idea of accepting themselves in their complete natural state, sans relaxer and et al. 

please don’t get me wrong, i am not a believer that ever woman who wears their hair straightened doesn’t love herself.  that’s a myth.  it’s as much of a crock as every woman with an afro/locs is “conscious”.  i’m just speaking on my thoughts of the women that i have met and that i have had time to observe and assess. 

it is a journey for most people.  leaving the familiar and roaming to the unknown because many have had their hair straightened for so many years, they don’t even recognize their own texture.  and i can say that during my journey, i have not only run into women who are uncomfortable with me being natural, but i have also ran into some black men.  of course they compliment me and how good i look, but when i suggest that their girl-friend, or sister, or mother would look beautiful with their hair natural, you can see the unease and uncertainty in their face.  it makes me sad to see the fear in their face at the very mention of changing the aesthetics of their females.

today i read an interesting article on Clutch Magazine. it prompted the question of  “are white men more appreciative of natural hair?”  in my experience, i would say yes.  however, i am very grateful that the majority of men in my life, including my loving husband, are huge fans of their ladies sporting their organic roots.  it gives them the freedom to play in it, not worry about rain, knows that she’s not going to skip out on a exercising (in the gym and in the bedroom) for the sake of sweating out a style.

chris rock has a movie coming out ( you can see the trailer here) that talks about the “issue” of hair in the black culture. very interested to see what he found out in his search.  as for me, i found out that for some, it’s just hair, and for others, it’s WAY more than that.

AKA Members Suing to Remove Their President

Okay, it’s been a while since i penned on own words on here, but i heard about this story over the weekend i would love to hear your thoughts.  i’ll reserve my personal thoughts about fraternities and sororities for the time being.  but with the economic situation of the country and the socio-economic status of many black americans, do you think that it is right for organizations (specifically greek in this case) to spend money on things that do not benefit the communities in which they claim to serve?

Sharing Your Faith

Sharing Your Faith
Shaun King

“How much does a so-called Christian have to hate you if they really believe in Jesus, Heaven, and Hell and never tell you about it?”

While those words may sound like they came from your local evangelist or pastor, they didn’t. Not even close. Instead, they came from the mouth of one of the most famous non-believing atheists in the world, Penn Jillette, widely known as the bigger half of the performance group Penn & Teller.

When I heard Penn make this statement it was like a kick in the gut. Let me tell you why. Penn made this statement after finishing a show. A very warm, sincere man waited patiently to meet with Penn and gave Penn a small Bible and told him very kindly how much he believed and valued the words inside of that book.

Now, before you get too happy I want to tell you ahead of time that Penn still says he could care less about the Bible, but he was moved by earnest honesty and beliefs of a simple man that wanted to share his faith in God with someone that he admired. Not cliché, not judgmental, not snobbish, the man very plainly and simply shared his faith and it broke through Penn’s very cynical exterior walls.

When reflecting back on this encounter later that evening, Penn said that he wasn’t even slightly irritated when the man shared his faith. Indeed, he said what troubled and irritated him even more than someone sharing a deeply held faith in God, was a man or woman that claimed to have a deep faith about a risen Savior, or an everlasting afterlife of Heaven or Hell, but thought so little about people that they never told them about it!

Ouch! Strong words? Yes.
But Penn is right.

Either we don’t really believe in an awesome Savior that chose the nails and the cross for us or we must hate people so much that we know this Savior for ourselves, but don’t want anyone else to know Him.

Who are you telling about Jesus? Better yet – who are you not telling about Him that really needs to hear His story and yours? Are you sure you believe in Jesus and in Heaven? If so, why not tell everyone you know about this amazing news we call the Gospel?

One thing that I have learned over the past few weeks with the deaths of Michael Jackson, Steve McNair, Farrah Fawcett, Billy Mays, and others is that tomorrow just isn’t promised and that we should never assume that we have another hour or another day or another random time to tell someone about our faith journey.

Maybe they’ll reject the Gospel and reject you and move on, but maybe, just maybe they won’t. Maybe God will use you as a springboard into the heart of that person or that family that you need to talk with. Just understand this – our faith is not a private faith. It’s not a secret, keep-it-to-yourself type of faith.

It’s a tell-the-whole-world-because-you-contain-yourself type of faith and people need to hear from you.
Today, I dare you to start sharing your faith today and see what happens!

Shaun King spacer Shaun King is Lead Pastor of The Courageous Church in downtown Atlanta. A king of multi-tasking, Shaun is a proud husband, father of four, grad student, regular guest on NPR, and an avid blogger at

R.I.P Michael Jackson

mjacksonwow, wow, wow!  who would have imagined Michael Jackson’s passing to come so soon?  i truly believe the magnitude of this great lost really won’t be realized for some time.  i mean, i know we all feel it, but i think right now we are more in shock…this man in his 50 years on earth has offered so much to us musically.  music was Michael.  despite all the eccentric and at times bizarre moments, one cannot deny his genius, gift, talent, and selflessness when it came to his artistry. 

what is your favorite memory of Michael Jackson?  a favorite song? album?


my prayers go out to his family, children and friends…let us remember to take the time to celebrate our love ones while they are still living.  don’t wait until the casket is closed for you to express your love, admiration, and respect to the people that mean the most to you.  God bless.